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Medical Doctor Nurse PatientFun Naughty Lough Jokes
Cocktail Party
An obstetrician and his wife were invited to a big cocktail party.
While mingling with the crowd, the wife noticed her husband making small talk with a very attractive and curvaceous blonde, who was in turn making overtures back at him. Since it was a large informal gathering, the wife just laughed it off.
After a while, she saw that they had disappeared.
Suspecting the worst, she rushed upstairs and checked the bedrooms. Sure enough, she found the two of them in bed together.
"Look, lady!" the wife scolded as she made a motion to separate the two of them. "My husband just delivers babies, he doesn't install them!"

Joke Submitted by Anaida (18), Google


John & David!
John and David were both patients in a Mental hospital.
One day, John suddenly dived into the deep end of the swimming pool.
David jumped in and saved him, and the medical director came to know of his heroic act..
He immediately order David to be discharged from the Mental Hospital as he is OK.
Doctor: We have good news and bad news for you, David. The good news is that we are going to discharge you because you have regained your senses, since you are able to jump in and save another patient you are now a normal person. The bad news is that, the patient Mr. John, whom you have saved, hung himself in the toilet, and died.
David: Doctor, he didn't hang himself. I hung him there to dry !

Joke Submitted by Celebcurry (20),

DEATHS THAT MADE EVEN TOP DOCTORS WONDER...
This case happened in a hospital's Intensive care ward where Patients always died in the same bed and on all Sunday morning at 11a.m, regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.
So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m. all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil........
Ju st when the clock struck 11...

and then......



then.....




then........





Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and Unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner............

Submitted by Puja Tibre (24), Gretna

Drugstore!
Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front of the store.

Submitted by Tony Evans (22), New Guinea

Counting In The Hole!
A man is strolling past a lunatic asylum when he hears a loud chanting. "Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!" goes the noise form within the mental hospital's wards.
The man's curiosity gets the better of him and he searches for a hole in the security fence. It's not long before he finds a small crack, so he leans forward and peers in.
Instantly, someone jabs him in the eye. As he reels back in agony, the chanting continues: "Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!"

Joke Submitted by Amiee Rickards (25), Mystique

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