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Ethnic Fun Naughty Lough Jokes
You Know You're From Northern Virginia If...

01. Speed limits are just suggestions.

02. You take a major highway to get anywhere (95, 66,28, etc).

03. You constantly complain about there being nothing to do, even though you are right next to DC.

04. You have at least 2 friends who have no idea what their parents do because its “top secret” government work.

05. 50% of your senior class went to either Mason, JMU, Tech, Radford, or UVA.

06. When people ask where you’re from, you tell them DC because its easier to explain.

07. You’ve never told someone you’re from Virginia without putting “northern” in front of it.

08. You dread going to the DMV for anything.

09. Its not actually tailgating unless your bumper is touching the car in front of you.

10. A yellow light means at least 5 more cars car get through.

11. A red light means 2 more can.

12. It takes you 30 minutes to drive 10 miles.

13. Your local news is national news.

14. If you hear the word “sniper” one more time you’re going to slap someone.

15. You actually know what the black boxes at stoplights are for.

16. You drive at least 30 miles a day to get to work.

17. You do your Christmas shopping online b/c the shopping malls are like parking lots.

18. Despite the fact that Virginia fought for the south in the Civil War, you are NOT, under ANY circumstances, a “southerner”.

19. You know that each high school in the region had it’s own corresponding McDonald’s..

20. You know at least 2 people who drive a mercedes, BMW, Lexus, etc.

21. The cars in the local high school’s student parking lot are woth 3x those in the teacher parking lot.

22. You are amused by visiting relatives who are actually excited to see Washington DC.

23. You are amazed when you go out of town and the people at McDonalds speak english.

24. You can cross 4 lanes of traffic in under 30 seconds.

25. There are at least 3 malls within 20 minutes of your house.

26. There are at least 6 Starbucks within 20 minutes of your house.

27. You or someone in your family has a Smart Tag.

28. You remember the Air and Space museum fondly from school fieldtrips to DC.

29. When traveling, you have your choice of 3 airports.

30. You don’t actually like the Wizards (except when Jordan was playing).

31. An inch of snow and you miss 3 days of work.

32. All the potholes just add a little excitement to your driving experience.

33. Stop signs mean slow down a little, but only if you feel like it.

34. A rich white kid driving a BMW while blasting rap music is a common occurance.

35. You call things “ghetto” even though in most of the rest of the country it’d be high class.

36. You don’t have enough room on your home lot to build a garage.

37. You know where to find Midgetville.

38. When you were driving on the beltway at 2:13am on a Tuesday there was still traffic.

39. Crown Victoria = undercover cop or Teresa Smoot.

40. A slow driver is someone who isn’t going at least 10mph over the speed limit.

41. You understand the meaning of “If you don’t get it, you don’t get it”.

42. Subway is a fast food place. The transportation system is known as Metro, and only Metro.

43. You’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere late at night and ended up in a bad part of DC.

44. Most of Loudoun County is the “middle of nowhere”.

45. They just tore down the old farm house across the street and put 12 new houses in its place.

46. You know who Elliott is.

47. Someone has honked at you because you didn’t peal out the second the light turned green.

48. You’ve honked at someone because they didn’t peal out the second the light turned green.

49. Two words: rush hour.

50. For the cost of your house, you could own a small town in Iowa.

51. Helicopters, F-15s, and airplanes flying above your neighborhood is a normal occurance.

52. If you stay on the same road long enough, it will eventually have 3 new names.

Arabian humor Submitted by Seximinic (), stumbleupon


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